Hank Hill Quotes: Great Quotations from King of the Hill

Bobby Hill Quotations From King of the Hill

  • I like Jeff Gordon, he's handsome!
  • Hey dad , I like beer! ( puke )
  • (After Hank tells Bobby, "Hell, I'm proud of you, Bobby.")
    Hell, I'm proud of you too dad.
  • I think I messed up. I made Dad not like guns any more.
  • What are you talking about?
  • (Answering thatherton)
    No, im his son bobby and im waitin for my pie
  • (After seeing everybody bringing home deer)
    Now I know how all the Jewish kids feel on Christmas!
  • My dad says butane's a bastard gas.
  • My sloppy joe is all sloppy and no joe!
  • I'm not gonna need my toys any more. After I learn Sex Ed, I'll be too busy dating.
  • (In response to an emu escaping Hank's garage)
    I SAID I WANTED A PONY
  • That's my purse! I don't know you!
  • I'm a little worried about being a slut.
  • There are 96 ridges on every checker...except this one.
  • Hey Dad! I like beer!
    immediately vomits
  • (To Hank)
    Your hostility invalidates our contract.
  • Mom...Dad...I made Luannne pregnant!
  • (after Joseph says Connie's Aunt Flo is in town)
    Yeah, she probably heard Connie got her period.
  • (to Connie)
    Come on baby, why don't you come over tonight. I've got a new laser pointer.
  • There's some milk in the fridge that's about to go bad.... And there it goes.
  • Oh! Spoons! Can I assume the potatoes will be mashed tonight?
  • (Talking to Luann's plastic mannequin.)
    Relax babe. It's just you and me.
  • I'm drivin' the Hell out of this truck!
  • (After taking a womens self defense class, he goes around kicking guys in the balls)
    I don't know you! That's my purse.
  • Has anyone smelled today's trash? It smells way better than yesterday's!
  • I'm going to grow up without anyone to love, and die friendless and alone like Weird Al Yankovic.
  • (To Hank regarding the truck)
    Permission to say hell yes.
  • It's not a crutch dad, it's just something I'm relying on to get me through life.

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